Cold Creek Manor
Dark Yet Predictable

After a string of exceptionally fine performances in some better than average movies (Far From Heaven, The Rookie), Dennis Quaid was due for a clunker. This clunker’s name is Cold Creek Manor, the new suspense movie directed by Mike Figgis starring Quaid, Sharon Stone, Stephen Dorff and Juliette Lewis.

Cold Creek Manor starts off promisingly enough when urbanites Cooper and Leah Tilson (Quaid & Stone) and kids move to the country and pick the scariest looking house they can find as a “fixer-upper.” The house, of course, has a mysterious history and a former owner named Dale Massie (Dorff) who seems a little too willing to help the Tilsons repair it. Massie is one of those scary local types with a mouth full of “much obliged” and a head full of “gimme,” and he quickly preys on the Tilsons’ current marital discord.

“Dale is so rich with emotion and textured with layers of schizophrenia and confusion,” said Dorff. “It’s a real showy part. What I found most interesting was that you feel sorry for him.”

Despite Dale’s innate creepiness, he has a girlfriend Ruby (Lewis) who is sister to the town’s no-nonsense female sheriff Annie Ferguson (Dana Eskelson).

“Dale is like a pied piper,” said Eskelson. “The townsfolk are really loyal to him. The sheriff knows that to keep the peace, she’s got to keep it with Dale, because of his ties to the town. He has a charming quality about him, but she knows the bad seed side of him, too.”

Cold Creek Manor is reminiscent of the early summer thriller Signs in that all the elements are in place for a good thrill ride but it never really happens. Both films deliver a few good jolts but both stories get bogged down with the weight of their own promising beginnings. Cold Creek also has the feel of being written by someone who lives in New York City or Los Angeles—someone whose idea of true terror is spending time in a town so small it lacks an all-night Starbucks. The horror!

Perhaps Quaid will fare better with his upcoming performance as General Sam Houston in The Alamo, slated for a holiday 2003 release.

Cold Creek Manor is rated R for violence, language and some sexuality and is currently playing at Regal Cinemas in Boone.

Hysterical Blindness

If you’ve just seen Cold Creek Manor but haven’t had your fill of Juliette Lewis as a slightly sleazy small town gal, be sure to rent the HBO Films movie Hysterical Blindness starring Lewis, Uma Thurman and Gena Rowlands. The new movie, set in New Jersey circa 1987, depicts best friends Debby (Thurman) and Beth (Lewis) as they try to make sense of their lives and find men who are interested in more than a one-night stand. Rowlands plays Beth’s diner waitress mother, Virginia, who is hoping that she has found true love late in the game with a gentle widower played by Ben Gazzara.

The movie has little plot but plenty of character development as Beth and Debby routinely leave Beth’s daughter, Amber, at home alone so the two of them can cruise for guys at a neighborhood bar called Ollie’s. Thurman and Lewis were coached on Jersey Chick-ese and their accents, dress and mannerisms perfectly bring back the days of the big-haired metal bands and the big-haired girls who loved them. Thurman, in particular, gives the performance of her career as she plays a woman with so much potential yet so little self-esteem that she throws her drunken body at any guy who will pay attention to her. It is a sad yet riveting portrayal of a type of woman who can only define herself by the men in her life—the desperate sort of woman who either ends up with the sorriest of guys or frantically alone.

On Sunday night both Rowlands and Gazzara took home Emmys for Best Supporting Actress and Supporting Actor in a Mini-Series or Movie, respectively, for their roles in the movie. Lewis was also nominated in the category.

Hysterical Blindness is available on DVD and VHS and is not rated (it probably would have received a PG-13 from the MPAA).

Reader Feedback

The votes are coming in at a trickle (C’mon guys, throw your two cents online). Paul Maney votes for Adam Sandler and Jennifer Lopez as the most overrated actors making flicks today. He also stated that Caddyshack is “one of the most egregiously unfunny movies ever made” by a Saturday Night Live alumnus. Maney suggests we vote on (Simpson’s Comic Book Guy voice here) Best Movie Soundtrack Album Ever!

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