Changing Face of the Homeless

By Cara Kelly

This is the sixth story in a six-article series detailing the role of the Hospitality House in the community, its

clients and the newly initiated capital campaign that will enable the construction of a new facility.

Although it was a full year before Sonya Hamby saw her first female client, the transitional housing service coordinator for the Hospitality House has noticed a recent trend of families with children and single mothers who have found themselves without a home or stable place to turn.

The sleeping place, one of the three houses utilized by the Hospitality House, currently houses a single mother with a four-year-old daughter, two families with infants and another family with three children. The facility is a temporary housing option for people who are awaiting assistance from government programs, such as the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) or disability.

The Hospitality House staff has seen an increase in women and children asking for services, a change they feel shows that homelessness affects a variety of people, not only people with abuse problems or mental illness which is a stereotype associated with homelessness.

Laura Smith* is one of the women who has used the Hospitality House to help get her life back on track.

“Me and my daughter, who is now four years old, had been kicked out of our home with only two weeks to find something new,” Smith said. “I was riding around in my car with nowhere to go. I heard about the Hospitality House in a gas station and looked up the (phone) number. I had debated staying in my car, but with a three year old I didn’t want to do that.”

Upon arrival at the emergency shelter, Smith was told there were no beds available, only a couch.

“At that point, I said we would take the floor.”

Smith and her daughter were given a bed and stayed at the shelter for a few weeks before moving down to sleeping place.

“It wasn’t an environment for my little girl, so I was kind of glad we moved down here,” Smith said. “Honestly, it’s been hard, because I was the only one with a child for a long time, and it’s just not an environment for a little girl. Even when we came down here, she was only three and I was having to deal with people who aren’t used to children being around, so there was a lot of cursing and arguing that she had to hear.”

With no history of homelessness, Smith said adjusting was a very difficult process.

“To me, I had never been homeless before, and in my opinion you don’t find too many families in a homeless shelter in our position. At first, it was just really hard, so new to us and different,” she said.

“I don’t have any addictions besides smoking, but I just really feel like if I wouldn’t have gotten sick, I would have been able to work and take care of my little girl. There are families, but I just pictured homeless shelters a little bit different. It is hard, with a child.”

Smith had lived in southern California before following a boyfriend to North Carolina. Shortly after arriving, she found herself suffering from an intense illness and physically unable to work. Mounting medical costs and a lack of steady employment left Smith with nowhere to turn.

“I’ve been ill for a good three years, and the last year and a half has been really hard. Being homeless, although the staff here has been really good with trying to help me with the issues that I have had, it’s just been really hard when you have health issues and you don’t feel good ever.”

Smith said the most difficult part of her stay at the shelter has been trying to be a good mother to her daughter.

“Sarah* is at the age where everything she hears she repeats, so she has heard a lot and said things she shouldn’t have said, and it has been a learning process for her. Before we came here she was the best little girl, I had no issues with her, she was almost a perfect child. But everything she has seen and heard has made her a little different, and I have wondered for the longest time if I’m ever going to get her back,” Smith said. “She has adjusted well, she is a well balanced child, so I feel like I have done something right. It is all about my little girl for me.”

Smith has recently completed paperwork for an apartment subsidized by HUD, and she will be moving out of sleeping place with Sarah in the near future. Yet, Smith will not forget the help offered by the staff of the Hospitality House.

“I am very grateful that we’ve had a place to sleep. We’ve had a roof over our heads. They are very helpful, the staff is very helpful and Sonya is great. Just to have a place to sleep, and something to put in your stomach, it is great.”

The Hospitality House is attempting to alleviate the frustration of families who are living in the sleeping place with the construction of the new facility, which will include a specific family area with suites designated for families and playrooms for children. The family area will be slightly removed from the emergency shelter and men’s dormitories to provide a safer environment for young children.

To contribute to the combined capital campaign, call Pepper Berry at (828) 262-3461.

*Due to the sensitivity of subject matter, names have been changed in order to provide anonymity.